Chasing Freedom


ancient-path

Here there is a road that’s just opened

With scarlet leaves from November

The womb is wandering, time is skewed

Into branches of alluring encounters

 

 

Time is invisible, but I can feel her warmth and her breath

Hae.mi’s pattern of spell-binding designs

Like a new layer of myth-making and story-telling

There will be no rendezvous this time, only words

 

 

That hang between silences as soft as their landing

Passages to another state, remedies for life’s fascination

Laughing, I would unbutton your otter coat

Pour you a drink in the morning of your drunkenness

 

 

To keep you safe from your own wilderness and wildness

The lovely insanity you keep usually guarded and in check

I don’t have the heart to let you go, while

I keep traces of the sun and your honest glow

 

 

Hae.mi, does the dewy light hear our noon-time prayers?

As in an airy shrine, where our ancestors breathed

Might we know how to touch our own freedom again!?

Solace in the Sun


Sunflower

 

 

 

I received an envelope from the universe

It had your stamp in it, a sun within a cheek

Of the heart I never knew existed

And I wanted to please you like a burning star

 

But I could not reach you across

Distances or time, across the climes

Of fate and heights and wonderment

I woke to find my life had bled

 

Uncertainty and too much cowardice

I opened up the letter from my soul

To find my body had died long ago

And I knew you by your energy

 

I didn’t require eyes or breath or a brain

To know that somewhere our flames had mingled

Light with light, a hand with a hand

A home that never had a family to call my own

 

I was abandoned, brittle, and deformed

But I knew you existed, and that was a weird solace.

 

After Taking with Miss Sun


 

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We, do not sleep at night

We collide with stars

Our cold part goes into the Milky way

To be swept by the tides of clarity

Neuron reaches albino heart

 

Hope bleeds victory plump as the Moon

For a time, it’s 3am when you realize

That I labour like an Asian, but to no avail

Work does not win us friends

Success does not win us love

 

Nothing else matters but poetry and love

We can die in poverty, happy, finally

For simplicity is what it is

Our soul the necessary action of

Mortal hours wasted, or won

 

Like the calm hush of a thousand winters

We’ll only see sixty, maybe a few more

I won’t live forever, I’ll go hungry

Into the beyond, writing poems for reincarnations

Where I will forget what poems were or are

 

Or who made them and by whose hands

I’ll go like a surrendered flag bloody

With no business writing, I’ll just write

For myself, like a lost soul without a Sun

No map will recover who I was, that

 

Being who was never understood, nobody knew

How the pale baby of our dreams slip away

We, do not sleep at night

We just remember that thing that escape memory

It plummets like the night sky

 

Walking past the lives we could have had

Ignoring who was our wife in an alternate universe

There’s no composure to wasting potential

It’s just all we can do in the bottleneck design

Of a capitalistic world created to eat itself

 

There’s no room for love for me, only survival

I am a masochist, martyr, beggar and dreamer

That’s the last monument to my failed Ego

I have enough ID to last me into dog-eared certainty

I’m certain I love life more than others

Even if it does not always seem that way.

 

Salt In the Wounds of the Earth 


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Salt In the Wounds of the Earth

Eun Ji, the rain is coming down
Like the mirror’s play of cloud-flow
Not too different like time
We cannot force our way
Sometimes the path must invite us

To feel a salty waltz of breeze
And surrender to what must be
While our hearts remain private

In the abode of crows and lovers
Who leave us, while we must
Find freedom against the four sides
Of the world, I will wait
While the two Suns

Of my Soul and Spirit cool
O’ save me, that I have been executed
For my deliverance unto eccentricity

The hotter sun will be frozen first
While this Earth raises her temperature
Many a state will go without water
And I will be not quenched by mortality
Nor the little words that the galaxy

Echoes in our voice, so sublime
What famines I have known
And such spiritual ambiguity

I have traced in what I write
The living trunk of fear and procrastination
So much of the human condition
That is fresh, unearthed, with roots
That craves more life than one mere star.

Legacies of our stars


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Legacies of our stars

It’s the Spring, it knows what we are
But knows not what we may be
And everything is possibility
Beneath these stars, this world stage

What part shall we play
In these seasons four, whom we love
But trust a few, doing wrong to none
There is a tide in us that flows

From love to love to legacy
It’s what we do that finally counts
The actions for which a life was made
And words have a foolish wit

For believing themselves acts, they make us witty fools
No legacy is so rich as honesty
Hell is an empty place, with all the devils here
Listen to all, speak your heart to a few
It’s the Spring, it’s time to show another face.

Bereft of this Life


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Bereft of this Life

There is a slant of fate that is cruel
How unbearable the dull numbness
In comparison to the sharp and known

Somehow the lateral events
Does not appease a soul
Connected to the vertical order of the now

Death follows me like a source of solutions
To the inevitable need to
Remember privately, what is important
There is no convenient resolution

To this problem, I am afraid
We are not meant to succeed
In a material world that craves

Always more, profit, fuel, addiction
We consume and they learn to prey
Upon our talents for consumption

If I conduct seppuku (taking my life for honour)
Don’t forgive me, realize
That I wasn’t an ironic spirit
I was too serious and bereft of this life.

(When hope has no face)


9

It Asked a Crumb of Me

Hope is the thing that catches you
When you have children
It perches in your soul like

A quiet song, you cannot explain it
Faith has feathers without words
It’s simple, profound

And has a quality that never stops
Its flight traverses dawns
Hope is a quality of purpose

To have a future is enough
Little birds must content with
All the dangers, just like you

Hope is not found in all
The parts of this world, some resent it
Others have reset it, it lingers

In the back of our minds
Even when storms have come
Hope inches you forward
Sore from tragedies, it brings you
Your people, and sometimes

That is enough to get through another day
Sometimes nobody comes
And you must go inside
To find the peace of the strangest sea
To find crumbs of divinity.

Units of Identity


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Units of Identity

Everyone is more or less
A translation of who they used to be
That being said, don’t get so

Settled in your own skin
Better to try new things
Find new people, mingle a little?
Everyone gets simpler as they
Ease into their own skin

It may take a few decades
Uphill and then downhill
So they say, so let go a little

Everyone is more or less
A poor translation of who
They wanted to be and resigned
With serendipity, they find
They can accept more than they once

Might have tolerated, it’s called
Life as a compromise, it’s the
Human journey, so we finally

Learn not to measure, judge, label
Inner peace is more valuable
Than analysis you might say.

Before the azure sister of spring


61

Before the azure sister of spring

I met a traveller from an antique land
With golden lips and stories of the future
He spoken of love outlasting weary fate

The lone and level destiny we all must face
I would have sung his song
Had I known the lyrics of dreams

These echoes and lights unto eternity
And seasons that pass with a blink
Of tears and farewells, and all

That is beautiful will come yet again
In another body and mind, to be sure
We are all nomads travelling

From one place to another
And we know where we go
Even if we feign ignorance

The rivers have always mingled
With the oceans and everything
Has always been single, by laws divine

And the Earth never could kiss
High heaven, and the birds never stooped
To eat long there, but preferred

To stray among the clasps of sunlight
What is this sweet embrace of youth?
Is it the cry of life or the nudge of death?

On Carriage held but just ourselves and Immortality


54

On Carriage held but just ourselves and Immortality

I cannot stop for death
One man’s heart breaking
Is another woman’s birth
I cannot live in vain

For there has never been
Another one quite like me
Not I, unto the nest again
Descendent divinity shall wrap

All my mortal wounds
Filling me with light
Hope is the thing with feathers
That fly on dreams that dance

At every dawn, at every twilight
I cannot stop for death
But I must risk it all
To live the life I want

Death will not ask me for directions
When it is to Immorality
Of the soul for which I walk
I know no haste, for I believe

In my appointed hour and place
I cannot stop for death
For Fate has me in his civility
I labour past leisure for a cause

Of which all previous acts accumulate
I cannot stop for death
For eternity will feel jaded
If I stop for long for anyone.

The Joys of pain


51

There are evenings
Without angels
That burn with the feeling
Of human pain

You know what it brings
A voluptuousness
Of poetry in lunatics
An eternal orchestra

Of spirits gone unrealized
Broken dreams, unfashionable
Alienation and furious sub-selves
Sad men made angels of the sun

And the moon became
Our attendant ghost
Of the Sea and the mortals pain
So very brief, but not as

Brief as our love
Before AI we had no memory
Only a little advice from
Half-hearted parents

The antiquest of society
An accord of repetitions
Blunt and dull and flashing
For something new

That never seemed to come
A future of pointed night
That never burst properly.

Inner child metaphor of a tree


18

The trees they rise up
As if up from their own free will
Into the light, wild, happy
Strong, if only I could be that way
But nature did not make me strong
And I was not born free
But chained, enslaved, shy

But what if the dreams
Were grafted to my branches
Like fruit and I could see
The horizon with replanted forests
What if I could breathe clean fresh
Perspectives for breakfast?
Fit with buds for birds to ransack

Or pollen to spread nature
The true nature of our spontaneous
Selves, the inner-child without her mask
The trees they rise up
For too many generations, with
The secret of the ancient taste
From our growth what silver fir

Reveals the truth that was our destiny?
It was not the water, wood, air, light
These were only elements
Of how we found what we were made of
It’s just that way if I am a barren stem
I won’t be blown around as much
Nor catch the eye of creatures

But what could I then become
In an open sunlit field, left as I was…

Sea People


61

Our love was not other than this
It did not, not break on the shores
Like the waves of oceans
Across from which we came

You were native and I was immigrant
Or was I foreigner and you were
Oriental? A lowered eyelid of heart
Far in the distance, coming closer

Like a strange shell of our souls
Meeting, side by side, we tried
To explain it, but it was what it was
That higher instinct to flight

Love is a flight from reality
If we’d close our eyes
We might have missed it
The breath that mingles with years

And the solace that comes
From deep loyalty and ultimate
Belonging, it’s the shore alight
After a thousand empty voyages

Our love was not other than this
The body of a flower born to bloom
On a lonely branch, requiring timing
Nature did that to us, she let us go

Against the musical rhythm
Of our fate where we met
Changing our lives forever.

Nature 520:1


57

For I know the plans I have for you
Said Nature, to the beast
On whatever star, of artificial or organic
Intelligence, your design is place

Where energies collide
Plans to prosper and plans not
To harm you, and your descendants
Will be good and just

Plans to give you hope and a future
Taste and see that Nature is good
Blessed are those who follow her laws
And those who hope in the stars

Will renew their strength and soar
Like miracles from their Earths
They will walk on strange worlds
And not faint, for they will be

Custodians of life, protecting, nurturing
As was their true purpose, as they
Once were by me, Said Nature
As the home star burst forth, a red nothing.

Psalm 3 – The Sacred


Lord, how in thinking of only
Myself, am I lost in a world
Of cruelty without redemption?
There is no God for the selfish. Selah.

God does not exist for those
Who compete against others
For profit, for territory, for power
Against humanity, against life

Lord, how the masses are
So serious about their lot in life
And equally almost stupid
To the wonders of existence

In their down-trodden state
They forget the grace. Selah.
Will their tears come to nothing?
I will not be afraid for myself. Selah.

If God is near, the heart finds
Salvation, in what was given
Not by taking, but in accepting
Not by pushing, but by smiling

Not by cursing, but in learning
How simple is this world given. Selah.
I am only now beginning to comprehend
When I found light, I realized
I had no enemies, I awoke to this.

Time Splits Open


53

In my love of day
My love invents another day
In my window night
Another night is invented

We are what we think
So carnival of carnal imaginations
Be still, learn to concentrate
For the calligraphy of fate

Shows sign-seeds of
Syllable-clusters, rampant sparks
That the stars in my hands
Invents a touch that deconstructs

Itself, these eyes that have
Taken these pages by storm
And this heart that cannot
Let any portion of the
World go unloved alone.

Photograph Courtesy:

http://www.deviantart.com/art/Camille-486793992

To Creation


If yet I have not all thy love
Remember this, I was born
Into your world, strange nature
I breathe, because of you

And your Deare evolution
I shall never have it all?
Being poor, and who made me so
And all my inner beauty is yours

I have nothing to bargaine with
Anymore, time can have me all
I have no great goals for my
Lofty mortality, “it is what it is”

So they like to say, I am tree, river
Stone, and just a bit of flesh
That grew in your womb never
Saying oaths that others do

If yet I have not all thy fortune
Let me be as you intended me to be
I can only love so much, do so much
In the fragile state for which I live

My remaining days, there are no letters
Like my genes to bring me home
Home is the planet I live upon
God’s riddles are for the absurd

Faith is not the kind of jewel I wish
To store in my brain, fruitless hope
Nor was any return love vowed by thee
Life does with me what it wills

I am as a fish in a polluted sea
Or as a tree in the last forest
I am as a world in ruins
For the sake of the greed of a few

Men who could not win your love
Any more than I could make the
Universe be aware of my existence
Love is for those whose hearts are young.

The Charm of Simplicity


46

I have possessed nothing
In my short life, but have on occasion
Been the unworthy messenger

Of confined love, or idealism
And a sense of hope
For the future, but aren’t
Other creatures so, is this not
The destiny of youth?

I have loved and been caught
In the energy of a generation
That changed so much, not

Changing the world, but
Altering their destiny with it
Good is not good, unlesse
We refuse the curse of invirtue
To be virtuous is sometimes

To stand alone, simple and profound
Deare love of goodness
For nothing lesse than thee

Would I have broke these happy dreams
That made a dreamer out of me
To be possessed by a divinity real
In my short life, to charm
Fabled histories and enter peace.

Photo Courtesy:

http://www.deviantart.com/art/–490230783

Selections from a Long Life


31

I’ve paced my human life
With a strange seed of Divinity
With grace accepted my fate
Not being attached, if
The God-touch is there or not,

Only a little, can destiny
Reveal if the God-light can stay
We have numerous births

To grow up with God
While wise men talk and sleep
Beyond earth’s longitudes and latitudes
The holocaust of our lives
Remains a supreme prayer

That non can reach Heaven
Who has not passed through
Their appointed hell, it figures:

The soul in man is greater
Than his fate, the life you lead
Conceals the light you are
We are all day-bringers
Walking through the inertia of night

Our lives are a march
To a victory that only the
Future can spell, our failures

Are not a failure, whom God leads
He who would love the world
Must share its pain, downtrodden
As if in myth, to realities remain.

Photo Courtesy:

1. http://www.deviantart.com/art/Where-are-you-488214058

And Marry Whom or What I May


116

Here stands miscellaneous enterprise
Whatever design my maker might
Prophesize, I shall do

Flowers & Suns understand
Hope is the thing with features
That allows us to fly
Choice the banter of the soul
At the brink of an anomaly

Society is made to control you
The cities keep you in slavery
And love, she binds you good

In her traditions, customs, rites
Another nuclear family, just what
The world needs, here stands a lifetime
Our natural portion of defeat
The pale luck of our suffering

Men too straight might stoop again
Women too generous, might
Welcome martyhood, what choice

Does an altruist have in a corrupt world?
Whatever design my maker made
I will fill my stars on earth in full
Taught waiting with myself until
The appointment with eternity

Has lost its meaning, I am afraid
Every moment is an eternal altitude
And Fate, means neither good or evil

There is a science to reality
“It is what it is”, they softly whisper
Never mind my breathless anvil!
Never mind repose, there exists no such thing
All is labour and tugging and forge

Until the years rivet faster still
To quiet your lungs of all this breathing
To still the beating heart, that doesn’t
Know how to stop.

117

Photo Courtesy:

1. http://www.deviantart.com/art/SAYS-486144944

2. http://www.deviantart.com/art/Hello-October-485904015

Letter to final interpretation


30

Like our bodies imprint
Not a sign of how we rejoiced
In the seasons of our youth will remain

The sand will straighten itself
The wind will not comb our hair
Time will not sit still for us
Dates will no longer exist
Our soul will be lost in energy

ii

Nature will rebuild and
The world will close behind us
Aware only of its self-centered drama

The languages our heart knew
Will not be sung in any dreams
The faces we once cherished
Will no longer exist, exactly so
None will help me, for I will be dead

iii

Though did I help the world
That gave me learning grounds?
As the centuries drink the amputated

Routines of generations
We even flew a little, in our prime
Had some rare ideas
Experienced ourselves more fully?
We loved with the wings of everything

iv

As far as I’m concerned
It was enough to be
Dismantled so easily by age

Decline was a precise surgeon
The engineer in my genes
Knew of angels before sunrise
Though in the anonymous paths I tread
I only felt a whiteness above covet me

As if I watched myself knowing

Brevity, mortality, impermanence
So aware of each moment slipping
Until I knew the name of divinity
And it was, already time to let go.

Last Slope of Summer


21

There is a stillness that catches me
In middle of the last hours of Summer
Catching me from the inside

Adrift, in the memory of haunted
Centuries that are no more
I hear low voices in the horizon
Chanting syllables of dust
Nothing moves but Autumn’s approach

Time is lethargic and artificial
I can feel the low sky vibrate
Inside my heart, each hour feeling

Larger, more spacious and more fleeting
In an acceleration where memory
Is lost in a whirlwind of sensations
And I promiscuously must harden myself
To survive these faceless moments

I have unlived today’s suffering
Until I escaped memory itself
And the idea that I was conquered by
Mortal hours that had no light to return.

Autumn painfully chafes


5

Photo Courtesy: http://www.deviantart.com/art/Kriszti-n-Darwin-476002094

Another year gone and going
Soon autumn will return with her
Spices of colors, rejoicing change
Chanting loss, let’s say it again

Soon the uneaten fruits of our lives
Will turn to moss, and whispers
Once loud will grow so very dim
The symbols we tell ourselves

Will change, even our language
Will be more mature, us and we
These particular islands will change
Our subterranean castles will gleam

New possibilities, among the white
Of the harvests we carried from spring
Into the golden colds, the forever pastures
Of momentary pauses, the reckonings

Another year where we give up our plans
To the experience, our wanderings for water
Our return back to the source
All the efforts to be and have what

We already are, shadows crumbled damply
By the side of our journeys, how we once
Mattered so much to ourselves, now we can
Relax in a more divine detachment.

Scattered Fables of Neurons, Past Lives


12

with the precipitations of music
I saw that my number was up
an archipelago of magic began
with the script of pilgrimage
the clarities of the green earth below
with five senses that spin
to the grin of loved ones

serendipity, my body’s mouth to be
filled with water, your body
to gush sky, cuddle naked stars
I wondered what it meant to be alive?
so I tried it, to turn with desire in self-pursuit
and run across the fields
with neurons not made for lucidity

or mouthfuls of truth, but teaspoons
of hope, and morsels of beauty
that is all i could manage to swallow
so I surfaced with kindness
syllables with a humble kind of honesty
lyrics translucent as silence
words that echo to the radiant void

just to meet you, simply to stay awhile
I who, couldn’t move the impalpable forests
or divide quick sculptures of the wind
or remember the fragrance, of rain evaporating
into thoughts I couldn’t think
mortality was limited, but with endless things
a thousand beginnings, I moved like
steps where each step was saying ‘goodbye’.

Photography thanks to: http://www.deviantart.com/art/Remembering-all-of-the-past-33648388

LAST COMMENTARY ON FREE-WILL


71

The core of my heart is now patience and endurance
Without these, how can one live?
When they departed, Love and God
I had to carry on dwelling in this body
Then I Said to the wind, ‘Go and overtake them,
For they are biding in the shade of the grove,
And bear to them a greeting from sorrowful man
In whose heart are sorrows because he is separated from his people
I will be left to kiss black stone
And smile to the veiled faces left in my life
How many aspiring souls does it take to reach Eternity?
The core of my heart is modesty and empathy
For all that I have experienced has led me thus
In our robes of darkness from the anguish of fate
We must return to Destiny’s love-desire again
With God-desire enough to carry on
For freedom is thus, the beggars are in ourselves
Go and take it! With these new attributes.

Psalm 7


49

O Lord my God, my universe, my Evolution:
In thee I do put my trust, save me from turbulence
Deliver me from persecution among my own kind
Lest they tear my soul like last lions,
Rending my faith to pieces, while there is none to deliver.
O Lord my God, train me as I train myself
Let me learn good in every evil, and in ignorance
Find bright specks of knowledge, let the presence
Of Majesty persecute my soul until I surrender
Not to mine enemies but to God’s will for me
Yea, let him tread down my life until all doors are closed
But God’s own will, and lay mine honor in the dust. Selah.
Arise, O Lord, as all cosmic things, revolving Stars!
In the absence of judgement, I will protect them
In the absence of greed, I shall give unto them
In the absence of righteousness, I shall humbly love with them
For the congregation is the compass, the people are the journey
Let the Universe organize its energies, fate’s integrity is enough
That some die too young and others wield pain without remorse
My defense is of God, and to all people I must assume
God’s plan works in mysterious ways, until all wickedness comes to end.

SPIRITUAL SOLUTION


18

On the Egyptian papyrus
I read the star-chart of the future
There are no credits in fate

No discretion in life-experience
As if life were a mere accident
In some ghost-continuum of

Many possible futures, variables
Of natural algorithms of what
Was meant to be, after all –

Beneath Spring light as lovely
As candles in the Earth’s own womb
I felt the racing of embryos

Life, love and the plummet of years
Priceless as the attendants of lost hours
I sought to unloose the perfect

Formula of being, but there was none
No happiness that led to lasting joy
Except for the strange spiritual instinct.

Photo Courtesy: http://www.deviantart.com/art/Fading-Memories-448866980

FINAL FANTASY


16

The Soul selects her own Society
A county of Faith, path to Ideas
And Friends that point to her

Divine majority, that include
The chief work of our Fate, if any:
The unmoved low gate-river

Of how we made the World
A better more beautiful place
Life’s opportunities do not always

Escape the circumference of our birth
But sometimes an alien Will
Gives our spirit ideal conditions

To do what we were meant to do
Our bit of Bliss before we forget the light
Those dawns and sunsets that

Stamped our brow, the soul meanwhile
Lives on, in the sweet curve of years
And desires wonderfully renounced!

At The Hinge of All My Days


84

If I shouldn’t be alive –
Let others do, what I could not
Let them not save me
Any memorial crumbs

Our stories are all retold
Again and again, like being fast
Asleep and dreaming life
Our lives, they come and go

So quickly, if I should die tomorrow
Perhaps I will have been asked
To go abroad, to some further star –
And there I shall take compact Sunshine

With me, my first well Day in ages
If I shouldn’t be alive –
Let poets rise from every circumstance
Uncertain of themselves, so –

We all cheat ourselves, dropping
Threads of our youthful dreams
We conform to routine lives
If I shouldn’t be alive –

Maybe it is for the best?
To fade into tomorrow with
Rainbows held, like brief recompense.

Photo Courtesy: http://www.deviantart.com/art/Winter-Spices-412283366

Requiem for Everyone


50

Everything has its own hour
Where loved, treasured, not sold –

becomes our everything for a time
Until ‘nothing can last forever’ becomes
the day, the month, the mysterious year
where fate can unravel in a turn

So be it, looted, betrayed, traded, doomed
Our life is a mystery of cherry perfume

of laughter and fountains, transparent
as the constellations which depict
the cosmic story of individuality
miraculous, dark and the stories

We have always known until they
Happen to us, we encompass everything
Eaten by time’s hunger, under the wing of stars.

Photo Courtesy: http://www.deviantart.com/art/colours-of-nature-404205374