After Journaling


66

There is no burnt paper anymore
My age of confessions is over
I have nothing to hide from myself
My journals are just filled

With spiritual musings
The drama has gone
And angst is dead
No saxophone haunting

From my bedroom
No squalor beneath my
Guitar-fingers, only
The meditation of poems

The slapping phantom of laundry
An old apartment, beaten up
While my screen paints silversmithing
Of this unusual alchemy

The beating of blackberry wisdom
Into ripe aphorisms, it’s enough
For procrastination and myth
We all have to cross those waters

One day, astounded souls
Leaving games of chess and flirting behind
And filter flowers for golden messages
And live in a quiet place in Canada

Where the stars are not so cold
And all dark advice of shame is gone
Open to the wilderness, ready
To learn how to be free.

The Charm of Simplicity


46

I have possessed nothing
In my short life, but have on occasion
Been the unworthy messenger

Of confined love, or idealism
And a sense of hope
For the future, but aren’t
Other creatures so, is this not
The destiny of youth?

I have loved and been caught
In the energy of a generation
That changed so much, not

Changing the world, but
Altering their destiny with it
Good is not good, unlesse
We refuse the curse of invirtue
To be virtuous is sometimes

To stand alone, simple and profound
Deare love of goodness
For nothing lesse than thee

Would I have broke these happy dreams
That made a dreamer out of me
To be possessed by a divinity real
In my short life, to charm
Fabled histories and enter peace.

Photo Courtesy:

http://www.deviantart.com/art/–490230783

Something to be Learned


8

Photo Courtesy: http://www.deviantart.com/art/Estella-472873000

Wonder where the hard years went

Up and down and lost like blood and sweat

The monumental dramas have all but disappeared

For maybe love and peace

Can win the day, yet again

I passed a bridge, calling maturity

I broke into a dive, of self-acceptance

It wasn’t a matter of effort

I think it’s a function of

Synaptic pruning, lost memories

All the grown-up people say

The wine from these grapes

Tastes sweeter now, like wonder

Taken at a distance, with some measure

Of quiet detachment, where failure

Dulled by grief disappears

And joy is the only thing that can

Possibly take its place

No longer with boots of the hunter on

The chalk of a thousand sunsets

Has left its mark in nodding understatement

Of all the dreams left like alder leaves

Posterity knows Autumns well enough

That by disks of splendour, all that something

Set in a lusty tune, rust of dormant boughs.

As you strode deeper into the world


When it’s over, I want to say: all my life I was a bride married to amazement. I was the bridegroom, taking the world into my arms.
~ Mary Oliver

Photo Courtesy: http://www.deviantart.com/art/Horse-475589992

2

As you strode deeper into the world

One day you finally knew
The journey had ended where
It had begun, the voices soft
Lifted you to trembling with joy
A grace became your whole house

You were moved, divided
And put together again
Your soul kept crying raining joy
It was delight you knew, that you had
Forgotten, long since you were a child

Joy that has no purposes but to live
Observe, remark, joke to yourself
These were your foundations returned
Your memory wrapped everything
In a calm embrace, like branches and stones

You were a part of this all, energy
Came from one place and was moved
Here or there, but the world you loved
Well, it would go on, it wasn’t so much
A worry of yours anymore, little by little

Love became the silent prayers
Of your steps, until you no longer
Could exist, would exist, no more
One day you finally recognized your purpose
It was then you kept company

With death in that strange surreal space
Between Summer and Autumn when
You saved yourself, you finally did just do that.

UNCOLLECTED VERSE ABOUT YOU


16

take a look at me, here, get informed
this is who I have become
our four eyes like diamonds, starring
blending as if through the sun
the grass where I lie is dense and lovely

we are determined to love and laugh
as much and as often as possible
these hands are those so easily warmed
to the window, come, there i walk
after all harsh cries of life are over

in my sleep i encounter your eyes
it’s a recognition of happier times
you were that person, which i gave my life to
sweet and as wild as the imagination
those dreams like stability, are over now

i no longer yearn for what i once sought
i am no longer who i once was
but i’ll close my eyes and i’m able to forget
all immature anguish, or self-centered sensitivity
what’s done is done, all that is left

are the uncollected verses, of where I once
started for you, and lost in a game of love
it was chance that i knew you at all, i don’t forget
fortune or ill-luck, it’s all the same to me
we are dancers in fate, with new faith
I write old poems again, this time with peace.

Photo Courtesy of: http://www.deviantart.com/art/Poet-43902604

Your Olden Conscience Melted in my Arms


104

May the God in you
Forgive herself, like gentle rain
Across the many forgotten memories
We choose not the thresholds
Of our dearest lessons, only

The afterwards of shared stories
Dialogues with our soul
They ripple in our conversations
Reminding me that we are so fragile
All in characteristic vulnerability

Succumbs to the vision of wholeness
That would have been a life with you near
My friend, you opened up my soul like a wild flower
And I am filled with incredible gratitude
That some force of the world

Brought you near again
May the Goddess in you
Forgive himself, like quiet sunshine

My future is my past, and you challenged
Me to be myself in an entirely new way
I love you, thank you, forgive me, I’m sorry.

Photography Credits: http://browse.deviantart.com/art/When-Summer-Took-Over-375107084

The Riddle of Transience


17

Give me my amber revelations
A new territory of realism
Exhilarate my destiny into a new order
Of maturity, where I can confirm
The victories of my simple life

My period of prayers has passed
I need to act like an unbroken settler
With more determination
To prove myself in my own esteem!
Give me gigantic sums of obstacles

That I too might know the Common Bliss
The golden mean of happiness
My noon has come to dine, these
Are the prime years of my adulthood
Show me my capacity to live fully

Transplanted from a thousand roads
Life – is a different thing – in these new years
Enough about Bodiless Campaigns
The trial of visions left astray
The Solstice of biology urges me forward
On the last day, of the Spring of my life.

So Long Foreshadowed Days Have Come Around


12

We grew a hundred years in age
In a few months of love’s highs and lows
We died in our gentleness
And came alive in the silver cracks
Of our passionate connection

Thunderous tidings from your lips
Where I went sobbing home, imploring God
To make you grow fond of me, to utmost chilling
I fell by my Muse’s gaiety and zest
With too much useless art for your pragmatic tastes

I live to mourn and love in verse
Since you came and left, I having nothing now
But a more wicket heart that bears regret
In frozen winds and the itch of spring
Summer’s pageantry will hopefully hasten to admit

That I’m still alive , though I have been dead
I aged in months of crying sleep and tragic songs
Half up the slope of too much feeling
Where lovers do not come, and I must sit alone
As if in the dusty lashes of a lingering solitude.