So You Will Not Have to be Always Letting me In and Out


53

Today, there are no consolations
All I have been is as a dream
Nobody remembers, nor can I say do I
Remember closeness, I am learning to support myself
As foundations that require convincing proof

That this is no ordinary friendship
The way I am with myself, how I attend the banquet
Of my thoughts, life – what drink I pass around the table
Of so much longing, an expert at grief
Today, there is no consolation

I have congregated here to face, what I already suspect
That I have not the backbone, for love
I can deliver you form yourself in this moment
Says my mouth burning for sweetness
Today, there are no consolations

I must understand what it means to be wounded
Hands of my hands, everything is made of water
There is nothing drastic left, that can be done
I can no longer be the ring-knocker at your door.